My First Love (Part 1)

We promised each other that we won’t part ways, whatever the situation is. She told me that she was impressed by me and wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. We were happy with our decision. We were on a bench opposite to a small pond in a park watching the ducks enjoying the breeze. I felt like it was the right moment to propose her. As I planned earlier, I took a ring from my pocket, got up and bent on my knees and proposed her. She was surprised as expected. The weather was so calm and totally in favour of my situation. When she was about to say yes, my idiot friend woke me up and the dream of my life shattered😊

 Yes, you read it right. It’s a dream that never happened in my life.

My name is Ilyas and I am here to tell my love stories, where there is a story but not love. Technically they should be names as “Crush Stories”. I can’t categorize them as one-sided as I really don’t knew the definition of it. Most of us have come across this word ‘Love’ thought we don’t understand the real meaning but actively share thoughts about it through social media platforms. How funny is it, that a 5^th standard kid speaks about love nowadays, where I used to fight with my friends on topics like, the Blue ranger Vs Red ranger, WWE is real and not fake, how to spend my pocket money of Rs.5, etc…when I was in school.

Coming to my first crush story: When I was in school, I used to stand-in front rows during the prayer just so to see my girl.  Whenever I get a clear sight of her, I used to get a feeling as if I got an extra mark than my bullying topper friend in my maths paper; trust me, it’s so satisfying. Time passed by, but the technique of seeing my crush didn’t change till college. I changed but not the technique.

In all these years, I heard several love stories, but I haven’t had one in my life. For me no story lasted for a longer time because of several reasons. Some moved out of my place due to a work transfer, some changed schools and campus. To be frank, I never gave an honest item to create a story for my own. I just enjoyed the moment and went on. Moreover, we didn’t have so much knowledge about love, what the kids of this generation have.

I decided to pursue Chartered Accountant course post my Intermediate and moved to Chennai. I cleared my CPT (Foundation level exam in the CA course) exam and moved to the CA-Intermediate level. This is where the actual story started. During coaching days, I saw Ishitha for the first time. She looked simple, calm, and composed. I don’t know the feeling, name it Love or Infatuation, but I was attracted towards her. I used to look at her daily and with time, I had a crush on her. I tried to speak to her once or twice, but it didn’t go well. I spoke to her during a blood donation camp, where I was a volunteer. I was a little nervous to speak to but I helped her in sorting a problem she faced and I initiated a conversation.

My friends who knew that I had a crush on her started forcing me to propose her, but I wasn’t sure. If she did not have the same feeling about me then that would ruin our friendship. Days passed in dilemma and the coaching period was about to end. This time, I wanted to try my luck by talking to her and express what I felt about her. I shared my decision with my friends, and they motivated me to propose by giving some tips and techniques, which sounded so pathetic. The next day, we created a situation, so that I can speak to her. My friends who were standing little far were looking at us eagerly to know the outcome.

I was so nervous and went to the washroom to clean my face. I looked at myself in the mirror and tried to motivate myself. I cleaned my face and spoke to myself “that, I can do it” and came out of the washroom. I was shocked to see one of my friends with her, and she was looking at me. I understood that my friend told her everything about me. I walked towards her slowly and started speaking to her. I asked her “Do you love me?”. I was awaiting her answer.

She responded “Sorry, I am not interested in all this stuff, I have many things to take care off and I don’t want to add anything new to my mind. My family is not open to all this, they sent me out with high expectations, and I feel, I am not ready to decide at this point regarding love. I am sorry.” I tried to convince her, but it didn’t work. We agreed to be friends at the end, but deep inside I know this friendship isn’t going to work. I smiled and replied “It’s ok, no problem. “ She left from there.

After that, I didn’t get a chance to meet her and didn’t speak much often too. Time passed and we both cleared our final examinations and became Chartered Accountants. She got placed in Bangalore, whereas I got placed in Chennai. If I consider, my life as a book, this whole experience with Ishitha, would be a separate page in the chapter of Love, because it is the only story in which I took a lead to move forward. Even now, whenever I recall this story you will see my face with a giant smile.

One more thing to add, don’t ever trust the FLAMES Calculator. When I first used it, I was so excited about the result and I dreamt of it becoming real. But the reality has another face to show. Do you want to see the result? Ok, here it is.

Marriage! Funny right. So, at the end of the day, I would like to say, there’s nothing wrong to love a person, but you should be able to accept and move on when the other person doesn’t have the same feelings for you. By doing so, you don’t have anything to lose, moreover, you will have a lot of stories to share with your, kids and peers. It’s a win-win for both.

Hope you all liked my story. Part 2, which is continuation of this part is posted on my blog. Do check that and stay tuned for part 3. Keep Smiling and have a great day.

Signing off,

Ilyas

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Regards:

Avinash Reddy.

Note: The usage of names in the story is purely coincidental and doesn’t resemble anyone in real life. The story is based on true events, fictional names are used for presentation purpose only.